You know the old proverb, "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up dissension."? It takes on a whole new meaning when you are a parent. Frustration, annoyance, and anger can all bring out words and tones that stir up wrath and dissension rather than gentleness and guidance.
As a mom who home schools, babysits, and has a toddler and a preschooler running around, I can often be found in a state of exasperation. My voice gest louder and louder with every infraction. I am so over my sinful self.
In an effort to hold myself accountable and teach my children a better way to communicate, I have come up with this idea. Every time I "lose" it (all you moms know what I'm talking about), I have to stop (Immediately!) and go write the verse in our notebook. Every time a child speaks with harshness and frustration, they too must go to the notebook and claim the truth through writing.
We've only been doing it for a day and a half now, but it's really been great. Not great in the sense that I've stopped flying off the handle (hey, we're all al work in progress!), but great in the sense that it does curb my tirade. I have actually stopped my harsh speak in the middle of it and gone to the notebook to write the verse. The kids have also taken to it well. A few of them have been honest about times that I didn't hear the offense and come to me to confess and do their writing.
Here is the first page of our writing exercise. In one day, this page was marked by every member of the house who can write.
As you can see, I am the first 5 offenses!
What do you do to stop yourself from losing control in a frustrating situation? Please share your ideas!!
2 comments:
this is a great idea, jess. and one that i am going to implement immediately...with the humbling acknowledgement that i need the exercise more (and more often) than ella does. (and also with the recognition that she reflects my behavior, good and bad, making it extra vital for me to work on gentleness as my default position...) thanks for the thought-provoking post!
I'm not sure if you remember me, but I went to IWU for a couple years during the time you did. I found your blog through Erin and Eric. Anway, LOVED this post and idea about gentleness. It is such a great reminder for me who struggles with quick reactions. Thanks for the post. I'm defintely going to do this. My son can 't write yet, but I would probably use it more than him anyway! Thanks again and blessings from South America!
Kim (Carter) Delp
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